Do you answer the intention or question?

I remember, in my childhood when people used to ask me, what do you want to become? My answer, “don’t know”, People ask, “why”, I say, “that also I don’t know”.

After this a very simple, basic question and answer round, 2^nd round usually used to get started, and then I become suspicious about question which was being asked by the people on my progression. I was completely unable to understand that, why I am getting nervous when I was facing such question. Though it seemed very simple by its nature, but I was always suspicious about the intentions behind asking.       

In a very early age, child starts to answer to your intention and not to your question. Then every time when you emotionally deal with them they take only emotion and intention behind and not the structure you are building around it. This means, if your intention is to make them feed, they will resist if they don’t require it, though you are conveying it in different style. If this could be the case at childhood, defiantly adulthood requires more attention to use your language in a more neutral way. Through neutral way we can check the need of a person, and then we can go further. At very initial stage, if we start to push people with your intention, means the cooperation in communication will go for a toss for sure very soon.

For child stage, you can make it possible your intention to be correct by any which way as you need to discipline them, but in adults; if you are not sure whether you are starting with neutrally or with any intention, you can be found soon as like a Karna in Mahabharata, the character in Indian mythology whose wheel of chariots stuck in the middle of the war and become reason for his forced martyr.     

Neutral way of asking question and dealing with critical situation becomes important in communication and would like to through some light in my upcoming trainings, through “Clean language Methodology”

Sachin Dabhade